“I know,” was all I could think to say. “You two are really close, I get that,” she said having another blow at the tissue. “He’s a very ...pecial man to me and I can’t bear to think I am letting him down through my stupidity.” “When you say special?” “Oh, no, nothing like that,” Mia countered quickly sensing my reasoning. “No, your father wouldn’t do anything like that; nothing can come between you and him. I know what you have together.” “You do?” “Yes,” she said evenly. “Me and Toby had. It's heaven, Julie, heaven."Julie was surprised.Cassie had put her finger on it.It was like a revelation."But Cassie," said Julie, "that's exactly how I do feel."Whenever I'm around you, that's exactly how I feel!"Julie finally felt that she could verbalise what had been bothering her."I've never been host-form, but I'm being manipulated, I know it. But how, Cassie? How?"Maybe you are controlling my emotions, Cassie. I know I love you," Julie said, "I've finally worked out that I've always. So if you shy away from things wild, taboo or just plain illegal, you should'nt read my story. But if you want to know how I became who I am, how it is to live in my world for a while.. Then by all means, read on, step inside!It guess it started early, with my mom not giving a shit what I was up to, giving me the freedom to run wild at an early age. I never knew my dad, my mom having me when she was just 16 and my dad 16. I guess he was'nt ready for a child, I can't say I blame him. I went to. When he returned he was carrying three gun cases. ‘I had reason to travel to Birmingham to see Henry Cartwright concerning ammunition for the Fort,’ he explained. ‘In the course of conversation he mentioned that you had ordered hunting rifles David. It seems the Cartwright .303 is not suitable for all game out here in Africa. I mentioned that my son-in-law was now chief game warden of a huge nature reserve, and asked what rifles he should need. Henry said the ones you had ordered were.
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That hadn't been the original intent, naturally. Both had planned on returning to friends and family. But, graduating a year before Mom, Dad had found
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